100 Tips for Nannies and Families

Your babysitter accidentally spilled something on your new sofa.  Or she broke a valuable vase.  She apologized and was sincerely sorry.

But what if she was involved in a more upsetting indiscretion?  She invited her boyfriend over while she was watching your kids, when your policy clearly prohibits this.  Or she smoked in front of your children, which violates your healthy living values.  Or she let your young children bike unsupervised in the road, while she was inside chatting on the phone.

When you caught her, she said she was sorry, but, in these situations, is an apology enough?

Hiring a babysitter involves a lot of trust.  As the parent, you need to feel comfortable that she’s following your rules, instilling your values and focusing all of her energy on caring for your children.  And when she violates this trust, is an apology good enough?  Or do you need to find a more responsible babysitter?

I’m a big fan of open communication between parents and caregivers, and I believe it’s important to be clear from the beginning about your rules.  It’s totally valid to prohibit your babysitter from having guests over, smoking or talking on the phone for hours (unless your kids are sleeping).  Her job is to watch your children and keep them safe, so if you find out that your four-year-old was out biking in the road while the babysitter was inside for an hour, it’s time to find a new caregiver.

It’s up to you, as the parents, to decide which behaviors are forgivable.  If she broke your vase, it was clearly an accident.  But if she broke your trust, an apology probably won’t be enough.